Thursday, August 9, 2012

Mitt & Obama Simultaneously Select the RESTLESS AUDITOR as VP!

Oh, happy day!  (Singing and clapping in background.)
 
It’s a first in the history of our “country.”  I got the exciting news of my selection last night while I was walking the trail looking for dinner.  I hardly could believe it when my good friend Mitt called me on my 1992-circa cell phone.  Imagine my shock when Obama called a few minutes later.  (I guess current VP Biden plagiarized his birth certificate or inhaled it, or something else quite naughty.  Also, he talks way too much.  He’s apparently out, but this is all real hush-hush.  Don’t tell anyone, Frank!)  Anyway, I’m sure neither one would mind me making the announcement today seeing as I'm kind of excited and all. 
 
What to do…what to do?  In the service of my country, the Restless Auditor stands ready to become the VP pick by coin toss.  Wait…I see a problem with that.  What if, for example, I decide to join Mitt, then the dark side wins?
 
The only choice is “Yes” to both.  In a first in the history of the USA (I think), the Restless Auditor expresses his willingness and (shaking) excitement to undertake this new chapter in the old book of life.  Why, I am so excited, I have to change my shirt again!
 
(Also, I just adore talking about myself in the third person!  After all, he/I is great!!!)


(Also, don't forget to download my new App as soon as it comes out sometime within the next couple years, or so!)

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